What is Consciousness? It has taken me a lifetime to formulate my worldview, and it has been a lifetime of unlearning, like a sculpting process, slowly removing what concealed my truth. I sense this truth calling out every time I disagree with something, most of these somethings being the widely accepted teachings that govern our habits and beliefs today. Our mental disposition is aloof, feels guilty, scared, and angry. It is laden with a propensity to judge what we cannot ourselves accomplish, to project our shortcomings onto others and to expect happiness and salvation to come to us from some external source, mortal or divine.
There is a beautiful Sufi story in which a man sees his neighbor searching all over his garden. “What is it you are looking for, my friend?” he asks. “For my watch” the other answers. “Well, can you remember where you might have lost it?” “In the house somewhere” he answers. “So, why are you looking for it in the garden then?” “Because out here I can see, inside the house it’s too dark” is the reply.
This is our mistake in life. It is easier to search outside ourselves because that is the area we can see and hear and sense with our five senses. But the self we have lost, as also the entire universe, lie within our being. No external force can help us here. Our dependence on what lies outside our being for our salvation and happiness, whether guru or life partner, is a futile endeavor. Happiness does not come from finding and changing the other to better fulfill our desires. We cannot even change the other. The only one we can and should work to change is our self.
Raising Consciousness Within – What is Consciousness?
We are comprised of spirit and matter. The two combine to come alive through soul. Soul operates in consciousness. Consciousness is what we must work to develop.
Our purpose on this planet is to use our existence in space/time as a schooling that teaches us to harness self to rise from animal to human. This rise makes us upright in spirit. Symbolically, this is represented by the Scorpion who rises to become Eagle, the risen Scorpion. In astrology, Scorpio is a water sign. It took a flood of rain that brought all kinds of scorpions indoors, to make me realize why. The two symbols (scorpion and eagle) represent the lower and upper limits of the water element on and around our planet. The scorpion hides beneath a stone that retains traces of humidity.
This is the lower edge of the water element. The eagle flies above the humidity of the clouds that separate us from the sun. This is the upper edge.
The scorpion is a small, poisonous, eight-legged, vertebral animal, made up of two parts, its fangs and its spine. It is not an insect. Insects are winged, six-legged and are made up of three parts. Scorpions harbor poison in their last vertebra. In the mystical tradition, we move from Scorpion to Eagle as we develop the consciousness needed to lift this poison up our spine.
Today, we harbor this poison in our animal brain as fear, suspicion, anger, and the wish for revenge. By developing our consciousness to rule our being we overcome the poison expressed by our animal brain. This process is gradual and takes us through a long period of coping with loss, pain, illness, and grief. Our task as humans is to learn how to heal self by lifting our consciousness to reside above these limiting emotions.
The focus it takes to annihilate the scorpion’s poison is symbolized by the archer’s aim of the arrow. This is the wise centaur we call Sagittarius in the ecliptic, who aims his arrow to the Scorpio tail. This point in the sidereal sky represents the recently re-discovered Galactic center. It was established in 1954 by astronomers as Sagittarius A, at 0-degrees Sagittarius (same as 30-degrees Scorpio). Due to precession, in the tropical zodiac we trace it today at 27-degrees Sagittarius. Did the ancients know that or is this depiction a mere accident?
This notation between the two constellations in the ecliptic is so significant that it hints to the zodiac as a means of ancient teaching, written by men of deep wisdom. contemplate this for a minute; figuring and naming the constellations to harbor meaningful stories in the sky is the first act of writing accomplished by humanity. The sidereal firmament became the means to preserve oral tradition and we know today that it shaped storytelling for eons worldwide.
Beyond standing upright, for the Scorpion in us to rise as Eagle, humans needed to learn to operate their physical brain. This process kicked in at about 3500 BC and culminated at the dawn of the age of Aries (1800 BC), when precession aligned the equinoxes to the 30 degrees Taurus-Scorpio line in the sidereal sky. This the ancients labeled the Line of the Priest, whereby ancient priests delivered the education, discipline and trials needed for man to become an initiate. initiation aimed to teach man to apply rational thinking, the art of Logos.
As the human skull begun to harden, religions began to form to compensate for what man felt as an increasing separation from the cosmic mind where he used to freely interact with the divine. Myth and fairy tales preserve this memory. We assign their stories to fantasy today, but in eras (Yugas) Golden and Silver, (see Periods of Evolution chapter) they were reality’s norm. This separation from the cosmic mind is still in effect today, yet we are fooled to believe now that as masters of our inner computer, the one we refer to as our brain, we have reached our destination. Have we?
Of its own, the brain produces the fear and doubt we need to survive. As we learn to harness soul, we learn to silence our animal brain by placing the consciousness of who we are between what we experience and how we act on it. We refer to this as “civilization” and dress it in a multitude of rules that move us to a state of obedience where we abandon our inner curiosity and need for discovery. Without this curiosity we abandon our Seer within, the observer that helps us navigate soul.
Letting that go surrenders our ability to reach our core truth, the part of our self that urges us to become upright. Learning to intercept what we experience from how we react to it is an individual process that we should not offer up as obedience to the state, nor to fundamentalist religion. We attain to uprightness as we embrace our individuality and express it as responsible creators of destiny, who refuse to sit back and bathe in drama as victims of fate.
Soul incarnates as our lower self while leaving its divine part intact behind. We attain fulfillment when we place this lower self in dialog with our upper, divine half. Ultimately, this is our source of truth, happiness, security, wisdom, power, and peace. Building a connection between the two is like joining forces to build a vessel which we then learn to navigate in the upper realm. The ancients used the ark to symbolize the soul. Imagine what it takes to navigate this ark filled with every animal, male and female, domesticated and wild.
Each animal (that constitutes our anima) must be harnessed and tamed. As we harness what resides within, we learn to harness the tempest without. This is what constitutes the degree of Ark Mariner in Free Masonry.
Why split and fall into the lower self if where we belong is the upper? you may well ask.
Because only in the lower self may we build the identity, the I AM, required to survive as individual, self-navigating entities in the upper realm. If you think it is hard to “find ourselves” in this physical realm, imagine the challenge in the other realm, a world of shared architecture, without physical boundaries, where everything co-locates. In the upper world boundaries are set by thought and navigation is fueled by morality. Learning to use our physical brain to think our individual thoughts and dialog with our individual consciousness paves the way to morality.
This road started out as one of obedience to authority, be that king or priest, and to myriads of man-made rules, beliefs, and commandments. That was well fit for our younger essence when civilization was just birthing. We no longer require such parenting for obedience does not lead to salvation. Free will does. By this, I am not asking you to become rebels, no destruction is called for here. Just the constant questioning that raises our understanding of who we are and why we have been born here.
What does it take for one to fulfill oneself? How do we rethink our happiness as something we produce in ourselves, rather than seek to fulfill through another? Answering this mandates a U-turn in our direction, and the unlearning of all activity that places us in mask and costume.
Salvation is a solution we build within our being. We do this through our authentic self, bridging our identity to who we are in spirit. Our bloodline contributes to our physical constitution, its health and the emotions in harbors. Soul starts with identity and strives for spirit. When we pull it down through man-made methods of cause-effect analysis we paralyze it and worse even, cause it to seek for solutions outside itself.
Rising to the Seer Within
While our body is of the earth element, soul is of the water element. Its freedom is achieved in the air element, its divinity in the fire element. Ancient symbology from North to South, from East to West, depicts soul as a vessel, uprightness as its keel and mast, our ability to steer is the rigging and rudder, our ability to journey is the oar at the lower end, the sail at the upper. The oar navigates the vessel as it applies pressure on water, the sail navigates it by capturing the driving force produced by wind. Where rowing requires attention and muscle, sailing requires forethought, strategy, and a balancing skill.
We feel euphoria in our soul as we move from the labor of rowing to the freedom of sailing. Ascending consciousness encounters similar leaps as it follows a parallel treck in rising through the densities. Moving from earth to water is accomplished by the act of going within. Moving from water to air is a major leap that parallels the shift from oars to sails. It is especially difficult as it mandates that we let go of all personal emotion which also belongs with water.
To view all this symbolically, let us follow how we live life externally and how to parallel that by living life internally. The Grail is a symbol of this movement, its lower portion symbolizing life-external, its upper life-internal. The Grail reminds us to pose the question: What is this Grail and whom does it serve? Who are we in the lower self? Who do we become when we encounter the upper? What path drives from one to the other?
Morality is the physics of metaphysics. Our ability to conduct self is the path and its road is paved by going within to harness self. An example of going within is derived from aligning the visible (to the naked eye) planets and luminaries based on the descending size of their orbit:
Through the sacred geometry of the heptagram that squares the cycle, by going within one traces the seven-pointed star that yields the order of the week. Please note here that Day is Hemera in Greek, which stands for Tame. We go within to tame oneself.
When I first saw the correlation between the planets and the days of the week, I was left speechless. I recall the instance as a formative moment in my life. How the names of the week relate to the planets is revealed in Secrets of the Great Pyramid, a book by Livio Catullo Stecchini and Peter Tompkins.
The correspondence requires more than one language to be complete, French yielding the five correlations not obvious in English. I found this pattern of breaking and hiding across languages in multiple occasions. Did it result from ignorance of the full pattern or an attempt to hide its wisdom? Who knows…
We Build Identity Within
So now let us examine this principle in our daily lives. What constitutes living on the periphery of our circle versus going within?
While in the lower self we build our persona through our stories of drama. Persona differs from identity as it gets shaped based on what one thinks is expected and rewarded by the external world, be that family, society, or career. In contrast, identity is what we build once we move to engage the upper self through the virtues of authenticity and responsibility.
In ancient Greece, the drama festivals were geared to that very teaching. Each day examined a saga through three tragedies followed by a satire, and a comedy. No full cycle survives today, but we have enough in full dramas and fragments to reconstruct the full cycle. The dramas took the audience through the experience of admiring, suffering, and cleansing by examining the lives of great men and women as they went through their rise, fall, suffering and judgement. The chorus, representing the opinion of common man, acted as the judges and interpreters of the story.
In ancient Greecehybriswas the one sin punished by the gods. Hybris was easy to detect by the common man, as it caused one to rise and stand out beyond the norm. Hybris is punished by the gods like the one tree that grows beyond the height of the rest in the forest suffers the incoming lightning bolt. Living to impress the external world takes one through the vicious cycle of drama. To halt this cycle, cleansing (catharsis) must be experienced internally as the mystery of sacred matrimony, the hieros gamos of the lower with the upper self.
The Wheel of Drama
Northrop Frye observed that all fiction as also life-drama moves clockwise through predictable quarters equivalent to the four gernes of literature: romance, tragedy, satire, and comedy. In other words, take a character in a novel or a play, their acts will move them through the romantic, into the tragic, down to the nihilistic and up into the comic. Only wise characters who have attained to wisdom (like Prospero in the Tempest) remain centered feeling no urge to enter the vicious movement.
Think of the two axes in a cartesian table. The horizontal x axis represents the Self, and the vertical y axis represents the world. Those who live in pursuit of drama and exhilaration stretch themselves to rotate around the axis mundi, aiming to experience life in its fullest. Their plight matches the turn of the seasons. It will continue to repeat until the person takes a hold of themselves by moving inwards.
- First is the quadrant where both self and the world are positive. This is a time like summer, when we feel elated, also a time for romance, lust, and pride. Unless one is an initiate, this leads the self to hybris, which results in an offense.
- Second is the quadrant where the self remains positive, while the world turns negative and punishes the erring self. This is a time of tragedy, resulting in grief and pain. The self diminishes as it experiences its fall, or tragic period. This culminates in what the Greeks call the Sparagmos, or devouring, by breaking to pieces the hero.
- Next follows the winter, or satiric quadrant, where both self and the world are negative. This is a time of nihilism and fear, the winter of our discontent. Hope and faith are nowhere to be found. Infinite despair results in a change of mind, the metanoia that allows one to enter the season of spring or comic phase, where the world turns positive again and laughs at the self stuck in its anger.
- Finally comes the mysterious quadrant of comedy. Here is self is negative, but the world turns positive. As in slapstick comedy, the self engages in anger that appears ludicrous to a laughing audience willing to take pity on the suffering character whom they spring back to uprightness again and again. The culmination of a drama tetralogy was the hIeros gamos, or sacred matrimony, that brings about the catharsis of the soul. Later, in European Mysticism, this is called the Alchemical Wedding.
What exactly is this Hieros Ghamos? Is it the matrimony we find at the end of Shakespearian comedy? Two lovers who live happily ever after. Or is it the marriage and balancing of the opposing forces within our being that allows the self to transcend and meet its higher essence?
Ancient Athens observed this very order during its drama festivals. Take Oedipus Rex for example, he is born to a verdict declared by the oracle of Delphi: the boy will grow up to kill his father and marry his mother. So, the father orders him to be left for the wild animals to devour, but a shepherd takes pity on the newborn and delivers him to the leading family in Corinth to raise him.
As Oedipus comes of age, he realizes that he does not resemble his foster parents and asks them to reveal the truth. They admit to not being his bloodline yet have no idea who is. So, Oedipus decides to go to Delphi and consult the oracle to find out. That is hybris, why look for the blood relatives when you owe your greatness to your fosters?. On his way, on a narrow turn of mount Parnassus he encounters Laios, his true father not yet known to him, and they enter a fued as to who will pass and who will back off. Laios, being older and weaker, ends up dead.
This too is hybris, Oedipus being younger should have backed off. Once in Thebes, Oedipus weds the grieving queen, Iocasta, his mother. This too is hybris for he marries her to gain status.
We enter the tragic quadrant as the city of Thebes bows under a deadly plague. Once inquired, the oracle declares king Oedipus the culprit as he committed double sacrilege by killing his father and marrying his mother. Upon finding out Iocasta hangs herself, and Oedipus plucks his eyes out. This is the point of sparagmos in the story.
Oedipus enters the nihilistic quarter in a state of aimless wondering. The cycle rounds up as his daughter Antigone takes pity on him and offers to take him to Athens. Having reached the point of repentance (metanoia), Oedipus agrees, and Antigone delivers him to king Theseus. This is the comic quarter, in which the two become great friends and Oedipus redeems himself as he proposes a beneficial solution (catharsis) that will protect the city of Athens in a future fight with Thebes.
Yet the vicious cycle may only continue and in subsequent dramas proceeds to mercilessly devour each of Oedipus’ four children…
The Gift of Christ
To exit the vicious cycle of hybris falling to tragedy and its painful ramifications, as also to reach the ability to exercise rational thought, the ancients devised the rights and passage of initiation. This was a lengthy individual discipline that drove one’s consciousness inwards and raised it to allow men to achieve the heights of science and philosophy. Raising consciousness much resembled the act of journeying, on foot, then on ship, with rows then with sails, a movement from earth to water to air density.
Ancient initiation asked one to overcome each density through a life-threatening trial. The earth trial was the hardest as it mandated one to be in a near death condition for 33 hours. This allowed one’s etheric body to become slightly detached from the physical, enabling the candidate to recognize (a) his divine essence as separate from the physical body, and (b) his individual consciousness as separate from the cosmic.
Such initiation allowed one to claim the reins of his individual spirit and, using thought, to enter the upper realm of self where such spirit reigns immortal.
With that, man takes control over his individual spark of spirit which he works to improve through subsequent incarnations.
Without initiation, upon one’s death, matter returned to matter, soul wandered as a shadow in Hades (the unseen realm) and lifegiving spirit returned to its source, the Sun.
To understand this, please consider that when a non-initiate died in antiquity, his physical body returned to earth, his soul (or shadow thereof) descended to Hades and his life-giving spirit returned to its source, the Sun. The purpose of the earth trial in initiation was to awaken consciousness such that the spirit would live on within the individual earth entity, which was thus enabled to conduct the many soul and physical incarnations required to return to divinity. In addition, this trial allowed man to enter the realm of individual thought and produce coherent internal thoughts using his physical brain.
As man descended deeper in matter the earth trial became increasingly difficult. By the time of ancient Greece, many a candidate died in the process. Without initiates claiming their individual spirit, planet Earth would fail its purpose of raising humanity out of animal consciousness into the angelic hierarchy it was meant to achieve. This risk was so pronounced that it required divine intervention.
Rudolf Steiner explains that upon His water baptism, Christ, one of the seven Sun Elohim, descended to live and later die and resurrect in Jesus. Such a divine act was necessary to avert the danger of spirit entirely departing from the Earth.
Upon His death, Christ enters Hades (the realm of the unseen) and steps upon the Death of Deaths. These exact words are repeated today during the midnight mass of Resurrection in the Orthodox faith. In so doing, Christ unites his spirit to planet Earth and takes the earth trial for all mankind, eliminating the need for the 33-hour near-death condition. This is the true sacrifice of Christ, not His suffering and passion on the Cross. His commitment to remain united with planet Earth until all mankind attains to spirit in their individual being.
Christ’s commitment to prevent the spirit of humanity from returning to the Sun upon one’s death is what defeats the death of deaths for all dead and living alike. One need not be Christian to benefit from this Mystical Deed, but one still needs to turn away from the Fall and believe in the divine spark of spirit we are being called to harbor within our self.
Awakening the 5th
As a coincidence or because they recognized this phenomenon, the ancient Romans named our center of awareness in the region of the 3rd chakra responsible for the assimilation of food and knowledge, the solar plexus (prison of the Sun). Remember, this is where Adam’s apple resides while we live tied to the physical and experience the Tree of Knowledge.
In the esoteric Jewish tradition the Kabbalah reflects the separation as having swallowed the Ada’s apple, that Sephiroth (the Daat) standing empty in our consciousness. Our solar plexus is the Tiferet Sephiroth, and our chain to the Tree of Knowledge, the physical kingdom, is the Malkhut.
This Daat Sephiroth we must re-awaken by realigning our presence. Many a fairytale and myth speak of this awakening. Rapunzel, the Sleeping Beauty, Excalibur, the killing of the dragon…
Our chain to Malkuth needs to rise as our consciousness and become stationed in our Solar Plexus. From there we exercise it to become our living focus that moves where we aim it internally. What reactivates our Daat Sephiroth is our Knowledge of Self, and our ability to harness it using the fruits of experience collected during our prodigal journey.
To return to the Tree of Life, where we can experience our divine spirit once more, we must awaken our 5th, the region of our Adam’s apple, and the source of our spiritual intent. This is the sphere of the Seer or Daat Sephiroth in the Kabbalah.
This awakening of the Daat is what activates our dialog with the Seer in our upper essence. Awakening the 5th may be achieved in one of two ways:
- the ascent through the heart (4th) by practicing forgiveness and unconditional love
Unconditional love means that we harness our personal passions
and forgive all memory of pain
this is the Eastern path of ascension, the path of the saint,
also the line of the King (Leo to Aquarius) on the fixed sidereal cross.
- the descent from the 6th through the practice of authentic thought
Authentic thought mandates that we balance right and left brain thinking,
the very aim of the Alchemical Wedding
this is the Western path of initiation, the path of the warrior hero,
also the line of the Priest (Taurus to Scorpio) on the fixed sidereal cross.
Once we live up to either of these two mandates, we reestablish the missing Daat Sephiroth in the Kabbalah. To become true masters, those who achieve ascension must still harness thought and those who attain initiation must still harness love.
In Christ we find both paths. Through His earth trial He establishes the ability of Logos, or rational thought for all humanity. His teaching focusses on the path of Aghape. Aghapo in Greek literally means to lead (agho) up (apo). Notice how this notion is stronger than the way by which we understand love in western society today. Walking the path is not merely a matter of being nice and kind to all, it is a matter of responsibly challenging each other to rise into spirit.
The Four Baptisms
Today, we call the practice of moving inwards a baptism. Taken in each element, baptisms teach us to navigate the corresponding density. Instead of trials, the hero of our time is the saint who undergoes the baptism of each of the four elements. By turning inwards we annihilate the inner dragons that devour our being.
To defeat our dragons, we must pursue four transitions:
- Turn the Pride/Lust we experience in the Summer of our being, to Service.
- Turn the Sadness/Grief we experience in the Fall of our being, to Thanksgiving.
- Turn the Fear we experience in the Winter of our being, to Faith in our divine self.
- Turn the Anger we experience in the Spring of our being, to Forgiveness.
These steps we repeat again and again. They are simple to remember and powerful when applied, The process is one of hallowing our being to receive light within. As a pumpkin in Halloween! Is there ever a time that a given dragon is mastered? Probably not. Even Masters may fall, and the temptations only grow as one succeeds in this hallowing.
This is the only way I know to exit the vicious drama of victimhood.
As our harness moves within, there is no vicious cycle to be followed here, more of a figure eight as we learn to dive within the self, each time we experience weakness in the self.
We transform ourselves daily in small doses and in no particular order. Going within allows us to move from lower to upper self because it unites our axis of self with the world axis.
Note the alignment to the four seasons again, which we experience inwardly as the four temperaments recognized in the Hippocratic tradition: Choleric, Melancholic, Phlegmatic and Sanguine. We move from one to the other as the four qualities of our inner weather shift from hot and dry (summer) to cold and dry (fall), to cold and wet (winter) to hot and wet (spring). One change at a time… Balance all that to good measure Pan metron ariston, recommend the Greeks!
Notice that the earth baptism no longer requires a near-death condition, but it does require that one re-member and be grateful for the sacrifice of Christ. From this time forward what we need to undergo in the earth baptism is the ability to recognize and live up to our own divinity. This mystery was established as the Eucharist (Thanksgiving) in which we remember the sacrifice of Christ and what it means to the resurrection of our divine spirit. Taking the earth baptism means that we no longer fall victim to grief and guilt. This because both drive us back down to Malkhut.
We live in the palm of God and loss must be viewed as no more than a transformation of one source of energy to another. While we should never knowingly cause loss to another, we must accept our own loss with gratitude for our privilege to partake in the physical and the knowledge it surrenders when we experience pain. While grief pulls us down, gratitude and the act of giving moves us up.
Another mystery festival adopted and celebrated by Christianity is that of Christmas. Not because Christ was born on Christmas, but because Christmas signals the return of the Light of the Sun. While in the depth of darkness, the winter solstice, a miracle is called for to turn the season and return the Sun. This miracle is launched where the Earth is darkest, in the dark North Pole as a festival of gift giving. These rituals were established as a guideline and reminder that the offering of gifts and gratitude takes one out of darkness.
The mystery of the water baptism replaces the need for the water trial. By giving us our individual first name, separate from the family bloodline, we are symbolically asked to take responsibility of our own self, to raise our consciousness up our moral totem pole, out of the realm of fear. Fear is only present due to our disbelief in our own divine source and essence.
We harness self by going within. There we till our inner field until our soul awakens to its light. It takes inner training to drive our chariot back to the divine. This chariot is our focus of consciousness, what the ancients labeled the Philosophers’ stone. Through Soul we turn our conscience back to Sol (Latin for Sun). The U in soul represents our U-turn out from our fall, out from our descent, back to ascent. What we ascend to is our inner being of light, the spark of Sol we carry within.
Finding Our Path
There is myriads of spiritual modalities in our world today, so how do we chose the right one?
If the modality is there to sooth you, bring you bliss and reassurance, it is there to serve you for the moment, not to change you. Seek out the system that challenges you to go within to work on yourself to strengthen yourself. The upper self is not attained through mantras, chants, and rituals. Nor is it attained on someone else’s path; you must go within and find your own.
If you call that meditation, fine. Just make sure that this is YOUR meditation and you actively partake in it. Remember, we differ from the animals because we can watch ourselves think. So do just that. Do not eliminate thought, ride it and observe its path. Then harness it.
Always start from your center. Pose clear questions. What are you searching for? Do not conduct your search erratically, nor erotically. Avoid falling in love with one or the other master. Go within and ask; does their teaching fulfill you? Why? What did it add, what is still missing? There is no one master, and you do not need a guru to evolve soul. Learn to dialog and trust your upper self. This is your Seer, your inner divine spark. The word for God in Greek is Theos, and that literally means Seer.
We carve our path through clear questions. Questions create the pocket in which to receive the answer. This is the Quest of the Grail. Create the upper cup in you by asking. Formulate the question, then wait and be vigilant so you take notice of the answer. There is no telling when or how it will reach you, but it will, if you pose an honest and clear question. Do this for a while, as you prepare to fall asleep for example, and take a moment in the morning to check whether you have an answer.
As the process becomes familiar, ask the one you are in dialog with for his/her name. You now have gained a lifelong friend on the divine side and your dialog costs you no money. Most valuable, this friend is always there so you may never again feel alone.
Building the consciousness that bridges our two halves may only be done while our lower self is in the physical realm. What we attain through this bridge is our ability to INTEND. Without intent we cannot navigate the other realm. Intent is not a wish, nor is it a desire, it is our spirit in the act of creation. From the point of view of the upper self, our physical life here, our fate, our pains and passions are all the result of our inner plan, our inner intent.
This is a quiet process of stating a clear intent, just as we learned to state a clear question. Write it down, then wait to see how the intent manifests, it is never what you imagined or expected because it contains the divine knowledge of what is good for one and all. In the lower self that we are fooled to think that things happen to us. Then we set expectations of what things should look like instead. Back away from expectations, allow divinity to manifest without trying to manipulate tings.
It is not about things; it is about spirit. Learn to rise to the observer in your upper being and view your life as a series of lessons planned by you for you.
When you wonder “why is this happening to me?” think instead “what is this teaching me? Why have I called it forward?”. One answer that is always true is “it is teaching me to be more divine”. So, find solace in that as you dig for more clarity, and at all costs, avoid self-pity, doubt, guilt, grief, fear, and the like. These drive you down and take you out of your Daat, out of your divine essence.
Reconnecting to Daat is an individual passage, one accomplished by placing our full faith in our divine source and destination and in our ability to discern truth from deception.